Stalked by the 4 of Swords

Have you had a tarot card stalk you?

The 4 of swords was popping up as my advice or future, in just about every reading I did.

So I knew something was coming....

It is a card of respite & recovery (but I saw no signs of illness in any of the cards) and the general feel seemed to be that it would be a change, and even a little enjoyable- it was often alongside either the 8 of cups or the Sun.

I had the feeling of a fresh start, but couldn't see how that was possible.

The 4 of swords has now moved out of my regular readings. Looking back at the last month I appreciate this card at a much deeper level.

I always think the very best way to understand a Tarot card is to see it at action in your life, or the people around you.

So I went back to my own teaching notes to compare how the last month reflects my notes on this card.

#1 "Take a break"

Each year the highlight of mine, and the kids, year is Herstmonceux Medieval Festival. Amazing entertainment all day (jester, knight tournaments, jousting, puppet shows, live music) then open air cinema & fire shows all evening.

My children were so completely absorbed, I could just sit in the sun and watch knights in armour walking by, listen to the music and relax completely. It was a complete break from everything work & home related, just me, my kids & husband enjoying the fantastic entertainment.

That was my "Break" (a break from food preparation & a comfortable would have helped, but I'm not really complaining)

#2 "Invest your time in meditation, guided visualization, or just day dreaming"

With my husband & I both working, 4 kids to be home educated & a tight budget we don't get a lot of "down time"

But some how we found a day together, after the festival, to just talk about how we are going to manage the next few years.

So we spent a full day sat in the sun talking through possibilities. We came up with a plan to change how we use our rooms, including remodeling my tarot reading/healing caravan so it would also be my office. Having my office in the bedroom has long been a moan of mine

It was lovely just to sit and talk together, reflect on where we have come from & share hopes of where we will go.

#3 "There could be a need for mental discipline"

But moving my "office" really highlighted how administration & paper work are not my strong point.

Boxes & boxes of notes, ideas, possible plans under the bed. Envelopes full of receipts, endless files started and not finished as I tried my latest great idea to organise myself. Amazing just how much can fit on top of a wardrobe, or under a bed.

Now my desk is the first thing a client sees when they enter my caravan, whether for a Tarot reading or a Shaman healing session. It is lovely to have one entire space just for myself- but any clutter or mugs that I leave piling up are now seen by me & clients- not my ever tidy husband (who always takes them downstairs with a tut)

So I am almost finished going through old paperwork, collections of files, and various other un-needed stuff. It would have been easier to just bag it up & dump it in a shed, but I did manage to apply some mental discipline- and it has been worth it.

A good clear out usually is.

But for me the placement of the swrds in the Rider-Waite & Druid-Craft cards has always been the most important symbol;

"The separation between the three swords of sorrow, and the singular sword is important. It is suggestive of someone who has felt the pain of the three of swords, and is now processing that on an intellectual and unconscious level. This is transfromative work"

The strange thing is, just before the amazing festival weekend, or the day just spent chatting to my husband, or the nightmare of going through boxes & boxes of papers- my entire life unraveled.

Partly I think the intense eclipse energy, combining with some shamanic training I am doing- everything in my life seemed to split apart, crumble, be torn away. It was very quick, and I had some amazing support in bringing back together the parts of my life that mattered.

I do feel completely different, calmer, more confident, more centered in who I am.

Looking back I processed some deep shadow work, accepted my 3 swords of sorrow you could say. I feel like I am starting a fresh, with that clear ace of swords feel.

The current card that is stalking me is the Hanged Man, and I think I know exactly what he will bring..